Lyrics:

Well I came into a scolding wife a few short years ago

And ever since I lead a life of misery and woe

My wife she is a tyrant around the room and inn

I should sell her to the devil for a glass or two of gin



Sure I'll get up and go to work as mild as any man

And she'll get up and dress herself and go and have her dram

I never chance to say a word, it's well I know my due

She'll follow me with the fire shovel up and down the room



And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again

And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again



When I get up at breakfast time she'll tap me on the head

when I come home at dinner time I'll find her drunk in bed

When I come home at supper time at patience I must stop

'Cause she drinks what's in the teapot and I must drink the slop



And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again

And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again



Well one I asked me scolding wife if I could go to bed

She scarce gave me and hour on the pillow to lay my head

When like a roarin' lion she came bustin' down the door

She caught me by the middle and threw me naked on the floor



And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again

And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again



Now me and my companions go to a public place

She'll search around the neighborhood until she finds my face

She'll hoist me up in ridicule before the company

Saying', 'Petticoats is your master and forever more shall be!'



And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again

And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again



And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again

And if the devil would take her I'd thank him for his pain

Though I swear to God I'll hang myself

I swear to God I'll hang myself

I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again