Lyrics:

I sold your Rolex
To buy that gold Versace dress
I set free your whiny French poodle
So you can get your beauty rest

[chorus]
And I did it all for you
I did it all (I did it all) for you
This Christmas (this Christmas)
All your dreams (all your dreams)
Will come true

I put your mother on a Greyhound (you did what?)
You?'d always hoped she?'d have the chance to see the world
(Leave our mom alone) now she can
I torched your Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issues (no, no, no, no)
So I could be your only girl, and now I am

[chorus]

How can I forget
All you?'ve done for me, I?'ll get you yet
This is the season to give
But I can never forgive the damage that you?'ve done
(Damage that you?'ve done)
This must be love

I sank your bass boat (not my bass boat, no, no, no)
So you?'d have more time to spend with me
I hocked your grandma?'s diamond earrings
For the down payment on my SUV
(Fully loaded, heated seats, in hunter green, is this for me?)

[chorus]