Lyrics:

Hello I'm a truck
You've heard songs about truck drivers many times their stories told
How they pulled out of Pittsburg for six days on the road
Bout the Feather River Canyon and climbin' the old grapevine
That old roadhouse down in Texas and the girls they've left behind
You've heard their tales of daring and I think that's just fine
But if you can spare a minute well I'd like to tell you mine
There'd be no truck drivers if it wasn't for us trucks
No double clutching gear jamming coffee drinking nuts
They'll drive their way to glory and they have all the luck
There'd be no truck drivers if it wasn't for us trucks

Well there he sits in that cafe drinking coffee and telling lies,
He ought to tell 'em how he topped that hill ten miles back,
Or how he missed a gear and that Volkswagen bus full of hippies
Passed us like I was sitting up on jacks,
Or how we took that curve over on 66,
Hadn't been for me hanging on to the shoulder
We'd both wound up in the ditch,
If we're on time he takes the credit
If we're late I get the blame,
Up those hills with shutters open
My stacks are running flames,
My tach a running red line,
Sucking diesel from the tanks

I take him south and bring him back without a word of thanks,
So now you've heard my story and I guess it's my tough luck
There'd be no truck drivers if it wasn't for us trucks
There'd be no truck drivers

Look at him sipping coffee and flirtin' with that waitress,
And where do you think he left me?,
That's right, next to cattle truck - mooo
Why couldn't we have put me next to that little pink mack sittin' over there,
Gosh she's got pretty mud flaps,
And talk about stacks, they're both chrome
Well he'll be coming out in a minute and he'll get that bar
And he'll go around and beat on my tires,

You know,
For two pints of diesel I'd have a flat on the inside dual, ha, that'd fix him,
I never did like the way he drives anyhow,
Thinks he's God's gift to waitresses,
He never gives 'em a tip,
Well I know what he's gonna do now,
He's gonna take out the tape cartridge of Buck Owens and play it again,
I don't know why he don't get a Merle Haggard tape