Lyrics:

Well - She wore big knickers and she worked on't sewage farm.
Got my hands down her jeans and I nearly lost half my arm.
But after ten pints, she looked quite fit,
Couldn't wait to get my hands on her flabby tits.
Sweaty Betty Sweaty Betty.

Well I said Slap that and ride the ripples,
Just got to get my gob round her greasy nipples.
Flabby arse, sweaty breasts, thirty eight chins,
She was a mound of flesh.

Sweaty Betty, she eats a lot of pies,
Sweaty Betty, she's got enormous thighs,
Sweaty Betty, have you smelled her breath?
Sweaty Betty, she'd crush a man to death.

An' I knew that she wanted me to shag her,
So I stabbed her cunt with my mutton dagger.
I couldn't believe the size of her bum,

She used to play for Wigan at the back of the scrum.
Sweaty Betty Sweaty Betty Sweaty Betty Sweaty Betty
I've seen nowt like it since the day I was born,
But you know me, I'll shag owt that's warm.

Sweaty Betty, she eats a lot of chips,
Sweaty Betty, she's got massive tits,
Sweaty Betty, she's got a huge vagina,
Sweaty Betty, you'd fit a bus inside her,
She's so obscene, three tons of margarine,
She's like a lump of lard
She makes my willy hard.