Lyrics:

Sit down all you little children
Listen well to me
I'll tell of Blind Guardian
Dragonforce and Rhapsody

To listen to their songs
You need to know a lot of things
And read at least seventy times
The 'Lord Of The Rings'

This maybe sounds too long
For you child to be done
But don't be afraid my little children
Go and take your helm

No, this won't sound too long
Pay attention now my son
'Cos Nanowar will drive you across
The whole enchanted realm

Let's talk about the elf
Where does he live? Where does he live?
He lives inside the green of
Luca Tour Hill Luca Tour Hill

He mows the enchanted lawn
Drying his hair with the phon
Singing all day long
His homosexual elvish song:

[Bridge:]
'I've got it very long
I've got it very strong
I'm going to stick my dick
Between Looca Tour Illy's cheeks'

He stuck inside his bed
To do what can't be told
But we can sing together
The homosexual elvish call

[Chorus:]
HAIL! Elf! Elf! Elf!

And what about the Dwarf
Where does he live? Where does he live?
He dwells inside the bath of
Lou-Ka Tu-Ril, Lou-Ka Tu-Ril!

He cuts the enchanted wood
And the dick of Robin Hood
Singing very rude
In a bald and dwarfish mood:

[Bridge:]
'I've got it very long
I've got it very strong
I'm going to smash my mace
Into Luka Turillee's face'

He went behind his back
And pointed at his neck
What happened you may guess
It's time to sing our song at last

[Chorus:]
HAIL! Dwarf! Dwarf! Dwarf!

It's time to call the Orc
Where does he live? Where does he live?
He lives inside the sock
Of Luca Tureell, Luca Tureell

A mage with a great spell
Tried to stop his haunting smell
No Orc, as you would tell
It's Tour-hill who's dirt like hell

[Bridge:]
'I've got it very long
I've got it very strong
I'm going to use my bats
To squash Looma Tupilli's guts'

He waited in his room
For Numa Pompili's doom
He'll wish not to be born
At the sound of Orcish Horn!!

[Chorus:]
HAIL! Orc! Orc! Orc!