Lyrics:

Sir or Madam, would you read my book
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
It's based on a novel by a man named Lear
And I need a job and I want to be a paperback writer
Paperback writer

It's the dirty story about a dirty man
His clinging wife doesn't understand
His son is working for the Daily Mail
It's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer
Paperback writer

Paperback writer
Paperback writer

It's a thousand pages, give or take a few
I'll be writing more in a week or two
I can make it shorter if you like the style
But I need a break and I wanna be a paperback writer
Paperback writer

If you really like it you can have the rights,
It could make a million for you overnight.
If you must return it, you can send it here
But I need a break and I wanna be a paperback writer
Paperback writer

Paperback writer
Paperback writer

Sir or Madam, would you read my book
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
It's based on a novel by a man named Lear
And I need a break and I wanna be a paperback writer
Paperback writer

It's a dirty story about a dirty man
And his clinging wife doesn't understand
His son is working for the Daily Mail
It's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer
Paperback writer

Paperback writer
Paperback writer

Paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer

Paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer