Lyrics:

Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man
Who never really gave a damn
Only thing he worked on was his tan
Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man

He'd get up in the morning
To hammer in them spikes
Unless he'd been up
Drinking the previous night

Or if his bones
Weren't feeling right
Or if it looked like
It was going to rain

He had a tendency of
Being late for work
And everyone around
Thought he was a jerk

He'd take long breaks and
Say his back was hurt
And then he'd have
A drink to ease the pain

Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man
Who never really gave a damn
Only thing he worked on was his tan
Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man

His arms were like twigs and
His legs were like straws
His hands like a baby's bum
They were so soft

He'd wheeze and moan
And whine and cough
Then go home
And take a little nap

He never got fired
Cuz he was the boss' son
He just hung around
And bothered everyone

Never drove a spike
Not a single one
Though every now and then
He'd give a tap

Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man
Who never really gave a damn
Only thing he worked on was his tan
Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man

So he took his hammer and
Hammered one time
(*ting!* Ow!)
He took his hammer and
Hammered two times

(*ting! ting!* Ooh!)
He took his hammer and
Hammered three times

(*ting! ting! ting!* Ohhh!)
Then he got crushed
By a meteor and died.

Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man
Who never really gave a damn
Only thing he worked on was his tan
Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' ma