Lyrics:

On the seventeenth of March in La-dee-da-dee-da, a son was born to Mrs. Da-dee-dum
He'd arms, two legs, a mouth, and ears and eyes, and the usual la-dee-da-dee-dum

As he grew up he La-dee-da-dee-da, grew quicker than his other da-dee-dums
And when he was fifteen, everyone remarked, on his great big la-dee-da-dee-dum

He met a girl in La-dee-da-dee-da, she was pretty but a little da-dee-dum
But the reason that he her loved best was, she did na' mind his la-dee-da-dee-dum

Her mother was awfully La-dee-da-dee-da, her father was completely da-dee-dum
And they sat down to dinner of Salmon mayonnaise, and a bowl of la-dee-da-dee-dum

Now all went well till La-dee-da-dee-da, he went to take a bite of da-dee-dum
He coked the plate and the Salmon mayonnaise, fell upon his la-dee-da-dee-dum

Her mother cried loudly, “La-dee-da-dee-da”, her father sort of mumbled, “Da-dee-dum”
And her mother said, “Dear, you must try to find a boy, with a smaller la-dee-da-dee-dum.”

They married in the springtime of La-dee-da-dee-da, the honeymooned in lovely Da-dee-dum
But they found that they could na' get in the double bed, for his great big la-dee-da-dee-dum

So they decided La-dee-da-dee-da, to use to single beds for da-dee-dum
They slept together and they used the other one, just to rest his la-dee-da-dee-dum

On the nineteenth of March in La-dee-da-dee-da, he took ill with an attack of da-dee-dum
They wrapped him up in bandages that ended with a bow, round his la-dee-da-dee-dum

He died on the morning of La-dee-da-dee-da, a victim of the dreaded da-dee-dum
They put him in the coffin, but they could na' shut the lid, for his great big la-dee-da-dee-dum

So the undertaker La-dee-da-dee-da, Decided on a plan for da-dee-dum
He built a special coffin roughly three feet, two by one, just to take his la-dee-da-dee-dum

Now you can read on his tombstone, La-dee-da-dee-da, The son of La-dee-da-dee-dum
Here lies his body and in the next grave up, but one, lies his La-dee-da-dee-da-dee-da-dee-dum