Lyrics:

Here we are dear old friend
You and I drunk again
Laughs have been had and
Tears have been shed
Maybe the whiskey's gone to my head

But if I were gay
I would give you my heart
And if I were gay
You'd be my work of art
If I were gay
We would swim in romance
But I'm not gay
So get your hand out of my pants

It's not that I don't care - I do
I just don't see myself in you
Another time another scene
I'd be right behind you
If you know what I mean


'Cause if I were gay
I would give you my soul
And if I were gay
I would give you my (w)hole being
If I were gay
We would tear down the walls
But I'm not gay
So won't you stop cupping my....hand

We've never hugged
We've never kissed
I've never been intimate
With your fist
You have opened
Brand new doors
Get over here and
Drop your drawers