Lyrics:

(Spoken: From Gomer Pyle TV show) All right, I'll take care of them part of the time, but there's somebody else that needs taking care of in Washington.
Cpl. Chuck Boyle: Who's that?
Sgt. Carter: Rose Pilchitt.
Cpl. Chuck Boyle: Rose Pilchitt? Who's that?
(Kid screams in background. foreground: Shut Up!)
Sgt. Carter: 36-24-36. (laughter) Does that answer your question?
(foreground: Oi! I've got a little black book with me poems in!)
Cpl. Chuck Boyle: Who's she?
Sgt. Carter: She was 'Miss Armored Division' in 1961.
Cpl. Chuck Boyle: How'd you get to meet her?1

I've got a little black book with my poems in
I've got a bag with a toothbrush and a comb in
When I'm a good dog, they sometimes throw me a bone in

I got elastic bands keeping my shoes on
Got those swollen hand blues
I've got thirteen channels of shit on the T.V. to choose from2

I've got electric light
And I've got second sight
I've got amazing powers of observation

And that is how I know
When I try to get through
On the telephone to you
There'll be nobody home

I've got the obligatory Hendrix perm
And the inevitable pinhole burns
All down the front of my favourite satin shirt

I've got nicotine stains on my fingers
I've got a silver spoon on a chain
I've got a grand piano to prop up my mortal remains

I've got wild staring eyes
And I've got a strong urge to fly3
But I've got nowhere to fly to

Ooooh babe when I pick up the phone
(Spoken) Surprise, surprise, surprise... (from Gomer Pyle show)1
There's still nobody home

I've got a pair of Gohills boots
And I've got fading roots

(Spoken) Where the hell are you?
Over 47 german planes were destroyed with the loss of only 15 of our own aircraft.
Where the hell are you Simon?
(Machine gun sound, followed by plane crashing)1