Lyrics:

(kinky friedman, major boles, roscoe west)
Well, i pulled into dallat on a cold december day
Bought coffee and a doughnut at the greasy spoon café
Spied me a pretty young waitret standing by her tray
But she couldn't believe her sweet young ears when the waitret heard me say:
Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate
Eatin' ain't cheatin', lord it ain't no disgrace
Oh, bring me a lone star, make it a case
And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate
Well, i walked up to the jukebox feeling kind of mean
The waitret said, ¡°hey, stupid, that's a cigarette machine!¡±
¡°well, look-a here, young waitret, would you care to make a bet
And if that there ain't a jukebox, you can smoke my cigarette!¡±
Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate
Eatin' ain't cheatin', lord it ain't no disgrace
Oh, bring me a lone star, make it a case
And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate
You're the prettiest thing in dallat, is dallat your home ?
No, i come all the way from houton and i feel so all alone
I used to live in autin then i come up to big d
In hopes to get my big break on national tv

Honey, i think i have what it takes to make you a star ¡º but first ...
Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate
Eatin' ain't cheatin', lord it ain't no disgrace
Oh, bring me a lone star, make it a case
And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate