Lyrics:

FZ--guitar, vocals
Floyd--vocals
?--piano
?--drums

Floyd: Right away. Now what I say . . .
FZ: That's . . . recording. Let's do that, then.
Floyd: Oh [...]
FZ: Why . . . yeah. Why don'tcha do me right.
Floyd: Why don't ya do me right.
FZ: Huh? Well, we're cor-- recording.
Floyd?: [...] (is that on?)
FZ: Yeah. It'll pick up. One, two, one-two-three-four . . .

Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don't ya do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don't ya do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
Ya got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right

Ya got me beggin' on my knee
(Ya got me beggin' on my knee)
Ya got me beggin' on my knee
(Ya got me beggin' on my knee)
Ya got me beggin' on my knee
I'm sayin' baby, please
Come back to me

Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don't ya do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don't ya do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
Ya got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right

Ah, girl, whatcha tryin' to do
(Whatcha whatcha tryin' to do)
Ah, girl, whatcha tryin' to do
(Tell me whatcha tryin' to do)
Girl whatcha tryin' to do
I been true to you
Now whatcha tryin' to do
(Tell me whatcha tryin' to do)
Got me beggin' on my knee
(Got me beggin' on my knees)
Ya got me beggin' on my knee
(Ya got me beggin' on my knees)
Ya got me beggin' on my knees
Sayin' baby, please
Come back to me
(Why don'tcha do me right)
Ya got me scratchin' like a hound
(Ya got me scratchin' like a hound)
Ya got me scratchin' like a hound
(Ya got me scratchin' like a woooo-ooo)
Ya got me scratchin' like a hound
Ya know I'm country bound
Ya know I'm scratchin' like a hound

Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don'tcha do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don'tcha do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
Ya got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right

Girl whatcha tryin' to do
(Whatcha tryin' to do)
Now whatcha tryin' to do
(Whatcha tryin' to do)
Now whatcha tryin' to do
I been true to you
Now whatcha tryin' to do

I know ya tryin' to wreck my life
(Ya tryin' to wreck my life)
I know ya tryin' to wreck my life
(Ya tryin' to wreck my life)
I know ya tryin' to wreck my life
And all I wanted was a wife
Girl, ya tryin' to wreck my life
(You know ya tryin' to wreck my life)
I won't be sittin' much longer
I won't be sittin' in that chair
I won't be sittin' next to the radiator
And those . . . those curtains with the big roses on 'em
(Yeeeah)
You know I won't be sittin' there in my brown work pants
With my shoes and socks off
(Yeeeah, duckin'...)
Waitin' for ya
(Duckin' rats)
Sittin' there next to the little forty-five dollar record player ya bought me
(Duckin' roaches)
Cuz I'm mad wit cha
(Hidin' from mosquitoes)
Cuz ya tryin' to wreck my life
And I ain't goin' for it

(Why don'tcha do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don'tcha do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don'tcha do me right)
Ya got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right

Woah
(Ya know ya took my money
You know you call me honey)
Boo-doop
(And when I took you on a date
You said-uh I was funny
Why don'tcha do me right)

Ya got me pickin' my nose
(Ya got me pickin' my nose)
Ya got me pickin' my nose
(Ya got me pickin' my nose)
From now on anything goes
(Around your toes)
Ya got me pickin' my nose, baby
(Green matter flows)

Why don'tcha bite my neck
(Why don'tcha bite my neck)
Why dont'cha bite my neck
(Why don't ya bite my neck now)
Why don'tcha bite my neck
And go on scratch my back
Why don'tcha bite my neck

Girl whatcha tryin' to do
(Tell me whatcha tryin' to do)
Girl whatcha tryin' to do
(Tell me whatcha tryin' to do)
Well whatcha tryin' to do
(Tell me whatcha tryin' . . . )
Don'tcha know how to screw?
(Woo-ooo, yeah)
Now whatcha tryin' to do?
(Tell me whatcha tryin' to do)
Come on, country girl

(Sick uh duckin' roaches, runnin' from rats
Hidin' from cobwebs and spiders
And a lot of baloney and crackers and cheese the rest of my life
Take me away from it
Why don'tcha do me right)
Mmmm hmmm . . .

(Why don'tcha do me right)
Girl whatcha tryin' to do
Girl whatcha tryin' to do
Girl whatcha tryin' to do
Ya know I been true to you
Now whatcha tryin' to do

(Sittin' here every day, readin' leftover papers, eatin' cheese, readin'
comic books and eatin' chocolate bars that I bought 'n 1937 's no fun)

(Why don'tcha do me right)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don't ya do me right now)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don't ya do me right now)
Why don'tcha do me right
(Why don'tcha do me right)
Ya got me pulled up tight
Why don'tcha do me right

Floyd: Hey, catch that rat over . . .
?: Well, that was [...]
Floyd: Catch that roach there, he's goin' out the door with my shoe . . .