Lyrics:

ive been feeling dull as a coat hanger pretty as a picture of a patient on a fresh iv

giddy as a gangbanger with a set of sutres where his magic johnson used to be



yes i'll tell you just the thing you need to be the next big thing

lets start in with a test of your intelligence and zest for recovering

up and down and roundabout and out the back and keep your mouth shut

tight the lights are staying out but no sweat ive got aim like a mack truck

guess how many fingers ok guess how many more i can fit there

guess right get the toaster but you know miss guessing gets you nowhere



i've been baking cakes for the enemy

i've been dying to find out the hard way

ive been taking friends to the alleyway

two down now but whos counting anyway?



yes ill tell you everything you'll need to bring on our little surgery

something you can bite on and your right hand on the gun marked 'emergency'

put away that hanger honey you have many other options

how about a nine-month long vacation and a two-foot coffin



i've been getting up close and intimate

some close calls but im getting into it

in some states i heard you can burn for it

but ill burn that bridge when i get to it



it's not a bad thing

to get proffesional

its got a nice ring

mandy goes to med school



yes ill tell you everything you need to get to fix that thing

take two parts water one part gin and add a dash of nitroglycerin

kiss your woes goodbye say hi to bliss ters on the backsides of your

thyroid cysts annihilated with one twist of my trick scissors



i've been taking tips from the government

no trick mirrors in my establishment

fifty bucks a month ought to cover it

i've been getting real good at hiding it



yes i am the next best thing to falling off a third floor balcony

all my work is guaranteed to last the length of your recovery

ever since my confidence was boosted by these blank prescriptions

business has been booming and i seem to have made lots of nice friends



ive been baking cakes for the enemy..



he is a nice man

hes got the newest tools

hes got steady hands

and he goes to med school.....