Lyrics:

Ah, don&ampapos;t touch that dial**lf****lf**Here&ampapos;s a word about my ex-girlfriend**lf**Towards the end conflict off and on**lf**And I told her one night, &ampapos;Honey every time we fight**lf**I&ampapos;ll write a verse to this song.&ampapos;**lf****lf**Well, things got bad, things got worse**lf**Still I struggled on**lf**So sit back and get all comfortable**lf**&ampapos;Cause this little tune&ampapos;s six fucking hours long**lf****lf**And every journey&ampapos;s got destinations**lf**Which the traveler can&ampapos;t expect**lf**So how&ampapos;s that I&ampapos;m always winding up**lf**Down here at land&ampapos;s edge?**lf****lf**I don&ampapos;t know**lf**Alright, alright**lf****lf**Now if love is blind**lf**Why did her stockings always look so cool?**lf**Now I know I was paying attention**lf**But somehow I got fooled**lf****lf**Well, I gave her seven children**lf**And a twelve room uptown shack**lf**And when it all was over**lf**Took a dozen lawyers to get half back**lf****lf**But I already got me a new gal to ruin my life**lf**And she might just yet**lf**So I&ampapos;m helping her find an apartment**lf**Down here at land&ampapos;s edge, yes I am**lf****lf**Alright**lf**Now let&ampapos;s continue our discussion**lf****lf**Now take the traveler and the tourist**lf**The essential difference is**lf**The traveler don&ampapos;t know where he&ampapos;s goin&ampapos;**lf**And the tourist don&ampapos;t know where he is**lf****lf**Small world till they lose your luggage though**lf**Take the stripper who lives next door**lf**You&ampapos;d swear this kid was twenty-one**lf**Goin&ampapos; on forty-four**lf****lf**But luckily that ain&ampapos;t how she sees it**lf**Got a new tattoo that says:**lf**&ampapos;When I die, send the body to heaven.**lf**Lost the rest at land&ampapos;s edge.&ampapos;