Lyrics:

Hairstyles and Attitudes, are they connected?
Are styles we embrace a matter of taste, or values rejected?
Hairstyles and Attitudes, how do they relate?
How well do we use our freedom to choose the illusions we create?

Blowdry, bouffont, basic training,
cops in drag dressed up like whores
Cowboys in ponytails, Bankers in bangs,
Presidents in pompus pompodores
Mommas in mohawks, Daddys in dreadlocks,
Heavy metal goldilocks trying to look tough
The wet look, the dry look, the FBI look
But can you judge a crook by his coverup?

Hairstyles and Attitudes, are they connected?
Are styles we embrace a matter of taste, or values rejected?
Hairstyles and Attitudes, how do they relate?
How well do we use our freedom to choose the illusions we create?

Razor cut, laser cut, chopped and channeled
Curled up, slicked back, hanging on the eyes
Parted left, parted right, straight down the middle
Scientists say your hair never lies
I've done lots of research, it may be just hype
but the latest findings cause me to tremble
Categorize us into three basic types
by which of the Three Stooges we most closely resemble

Hairstyles and Attitudes, are they connected?
Are styles we embrace a matter of taste, or values rejected?
Hairstyles and Attitudes, how do they relate?
How well do we use our freedom to choose the illusions we create?