Lyrics:

One, two, three, four!

If I were Britney's boyfriend, I'd be playing hard to get
She'd come around begging for me, but I'd say, 'No, no, not yet
'Cause God has told me personally that I should remain pure
Just love me, baby, for myself', and more of that manure

Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney Spear

Oh my god, oh my god
Oh my god, oh my god
Oh my god, oh my god
Oh my god
One, two, three, four!

Britney would go off her tree at my refusal
'I'm Britney freaking Spears, rejection's not that usual'
'I love you, darling, for yourself,' I'd explain to little Miss
'It's your personality I like, not your body, serious'

Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney Spear

As far as a coy mistress goes, you'll like it more than she
When upon her curt refusal, you whole-heartedly agree
Girls justly hate the lecher man with sweating, hairy paw
But what happens when boy says no? They hate that even more

Oh my god, oh my god
Oh my god, oh my god
Oh my god, oh my god
Oh my god, oh my god

'Just like I told J-Lo,' I'd say, 'It's not your fame and wealth
It's not your perfect bod and face, it's you I want, yourself
Jesus wouldn't like us to, if he ever knew it'
'Stuff him,' I'm sure she'd say, 'Come on, babe, let's do it'

Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney
Thou shalt not Britney Spear