Lyrics:

Its A Mystery To Me ... The Game Commences
for The Usual Fee ... Plus Expenses
confidential Information ... Its In A Diary
this Is My Investigation ... Its Not A Public Inquiry

i Go Checking Out The Reports ... Digging Up The Dirt
you Get To Meet All Sorts In This Line Of Work
treachery And Treason ... Theres Always An Excuse For It
and When I Find The Reason I Still Cant Get Used To It

and What Have You Got At The End Of The Day
what Have You Got To Take Away
a Bottle Of Whisky And A New Set Of Lies
blinds On The Windows And A Pain Behind The Eyes

scarred For Life ... No Compensation
private Investigations