Lyrics:

Arthur And His Trusty Servant Patsy ride Into A Field Where Peasants Are
working. They Come Up Behind A Cart Which Is Being Dragged By A Hunched-Over
peasant In Ragged Clothing. Patsy Slows As They Near The Cart.

arthur Old Woman!

the Peasant Turns Around, Revealing That He Is In Fact A Man.

man man!
arthur Man, Sorry.... what Knight Lives In That Castle Over There
man im Thirty-Seven!
arthur (Surprised) What
man im Thirty-Seven! Im Not Old--
arthur Well I Cant Just Call You man...
man well You Could Say dennis--
arthur I Didnt Know You Were Called Dennis!
man well, You Didnt Bother To Find Out, Did You!
arthur I Did Say Sorry About The old Woman, But From Behind, You Looked--
man well I Object To Your...you Automatically Treat Me Like An Inferior!
arthur Well I Am King...
man oh, King, Eh, Very Nice. And Howd You Get That, Eh
(He Reaches His Destination And Stops, Dropping The Cart)
by Exploiting The Workers! By Hangin On To Outdated Imperialist Dogma
which Perpetuates The Economic And Social Differences In Our Society.
if Theres Ever Going To Be Any Progress,--
woman dennis! Theres Some Lovely Filth Down ere!
(Noticing Arthur) Oh! Howd Ya Do
arthur How Do You Do, Good Lady. I Am Arthur, King Of The Britons. Whose
castle Is That
woman king Of The Who
arthur King Of The Britons.
woman who Are The Britons
arthur Well We All Are! We Are All Britons! And I Am Your King.
woman i Didnt Know We ad A King! I Thought We Were Autonomous Collective.
man (Mad) Youre Fooling Yourself! Were Living In A Dictatorship! A
self-Perpetuating Autocracy In Which The Working Classes--
woman there You Go, Bringing Class Into It Again...
man thats What Its All About! If Only People Would--
arthur Please, Please, Good People, I Am In Haste! Who Lives In That
castle
woman no One Lives There.
arthur Then Who Is Your Lord
woman we Dont Have A Lord!
arthur (Surprised) What
man i Told You! Were An Anarcho-Syndicalist Commune! Were Taking
turns To Act As A Sort Of Executive-Officer-For-The-Week--
arthur (Uninterested) Yes...
man but All The Decisions Of That Officer Have To Be Ratified At A
special Bi-Weekly Meeting--
arthur (Perturbed) Yes I See!
man by A Simple Majority, In The Case Of Purely Internal Affairs--
arthur (Mad) Be Quiet!
man but By A Two-Thirds Majority, In The Case Of More Major--
arthur (Very Angry) Be Quiet! i Order You To Be Quiet!
woman order, Eh, Who Does e Think e Is
arthur I Am Your King!
woman well I Didnt Vote For You!
arthur You Dont Vote For Kings!
woman well Howd You Become King Then
(Holy Music Up)
arthur The Lady Of The Lake-- Her Arm Clad In The Purest Shimmering Samite,
held Aloft Excalibur From The Bosom Of The Water, Signifying By
divine Providence That I, Arthur, Was To Carry Excalibur. That Is Why
i Am Your King!
man (Laughingly) Listen Strange Women Lying In Ponds Distributing Swords
is No Basis For A System Of Government! Supreme Executive Power
derives From A Mandate From The Masses, Not From Some... Farcical
aquatic Ceremony!
arthur (Yelling) Be Quiet!
man you Cant Expect To Wield Supreme Executive Power Just cause Some
watery Tart Threw A Sword At You!!
arthur (Coming Forward And Grabbing The Man) Shut Up!
man i Mean, If I Went , Saying I Was An Emperor, Just Because Some
moistened Bint Had Lobbed A Scimitar At Me, Theyd Put Me Away!
arthur (Throwing The Man Around) Shut Up, Will You, Shut Up!
man aha! Now We See The Violence Inherent In The System!
arthur Shut Up!
man (Yelling To All The Other Workers) Come And See The Violence Inherent
in The System! help, Help, Im Being Repressed!
arthur (Letting Go And Walking Away) Bloody Peasant!
man oh, What A Giveaway! Did You Hear That, Did You Hear That, Eh Thats
what Im All About! Did You See Him Repressing Me You Saw It,
didnt You!