Lyrics:

I dont know if youve heard the news but Im a boy
Whos got himself a problem so big its no joy
You see Ive something that people claim
Could bring me fortune and instant fame
A face so ugly you could hardly blame
Anybody here for saying so

I think Ill bury myself deep beneath the ground
And come up only when theres no one else around
And if by chance someone approaches me
And that someone happens to be a she
You can bet your life in time of worry
I wouldnt hesitate but to be that way

Oh why cant girls just look at me and smile
Instead of looking at me as though
I will turn my head and before I go to bed
Gaily underneath the blanket go

Ive even wrote to Marjorie Proops, but she cant help
The best that she could offer me was disguise yourself
Well this Ive done would you believe not twice
But more than once in fact I think it was nice
So much so when Im inclined to hurry
I wouldnt hesitate but to be that way-oh oh oh

Woh! Woh!