Lyrics:

Football is weird anyway, man. Football is because were Europe, Jr. We came from Europe, man; were Europe Jr.. We really got it all down. We play the Europe game. What is the Europe game? Lets take their fucking land! Youll marry the queen of Sweden and have a boy. Then well merge with Austerania. Then well sell out to the Germany and take the Russians back and well take this from France and merge with Italy and take that from the other people and the Swiss and merge together and youll be the green on the map and well be the pink and youll be the blue.



Thats what we did here, man. What is football- our national pastime game now, it is. And what is it except eleven people line up, beat the shit out of the other guys and take their land. Its a ground acquisition game. Cept we only take it ten yards at a time. Thats what we did to the Indians- work em a little bit at a time. First down in Pennsylvania...Midwest to go.



Yeah, football is really..uh, well they moved the hash marks in...The guys found em and they smoked em anyway, ya know what I mean? Well they say theres a lotta drugs in football. They talk about ups; they talk about uppers and speed and they talk about amphetamines. They talk about Dexamyl spansules. They talk about greenies. Thats what the football players call em. GREENIES! Cause football players are into colors. LITTLE GREEN! Well fight for the green and the white! Gimme the green! Never mind the bullshit! Gimme those! Fuckin shit goes on in the locker room- Theres a lotta speed on this team, Bill. I know, I was downstairs before the game. Look out for this shit. Football players understand colors. They check off at the line of scrimmage- Green, white, 27, green, white, 27- bullshit, I had 13, gimme those! Yknow, fight over them.



Why is that football teams have only two colors and countries have three? Why should a football player sing to the red, white and blue and then get his ass kicked for just the red and the blue? Football colors are bullshit anyway. When I was in high school, they said we were fighting for the cardinal and gold. It was red and yellow, man. Fuckin red and yellow! Cardinal and gold, my ass. I always wanted to go to a high school where the colors were ultraviolet and flesh tone. And well win for the fleeeeesssh! The big flesh wave rolled down the field today.