Lyrics:

Vampires, Mummies, and the Holy Ghost

By: Jimmy Buffett, Roger Guth, Jim Mayer, Peter Mayer

1994

--Spoken:

'Ohhhh Rock 'n Roll is a scary business. No hit records, no MTV

videos...you'll never make it here...scary. NOT! Let's do it

Coral Reefers...



Looked in my laptop, what did I see?

A flashin' message says Today Therapy

Rather walk through fire than converse with my shrink

But I'm getting better that's what some people think



Talk about denial and dysfunctional things

Head's like a bell somedays it dongs and it dings

My brain play tricks on me it likes to shift gears

Spend lots of money, but I'm tacklin' my fears



Chorus:

Vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost

These are the things that terrify me the most

No aliens, psychopaths or MTV hosts

Scare me like vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost

Ooohh



Had a dream last night took a time travellin' ride

Back to my childhood where those monsters reside

They nack on innocence and dine on self-esteem

But I like to be in touch with what makes me scream



Chorus:

Vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost

These are the things that terrify me the most

No aliens, psychopaths or MTV host

Scares me like vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost



I was never ever frightened by the murderer on our block

He nurtured orchids and raised hamsters

The neighborhood is still in shock



La la la la, la la la la....

La la la la, la la la la la la



La la la la, la la la la....

La la la la, la la la la la la



So many dragons lurking out in the fog

So many crazy people mumblin' monologues

It's not the tales of Stephen King that I've read

I need protection from the things in my head

Like...



Chorus:

Vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost

These are the things that terrify me the most

No aliens, psychopath or MTV host

Scares me like vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost



Chorus:

Vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost

These are the things that terrify me the most

No aliens, psychopath or MTV host

Scares me like vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost



--Spoken:

'Ohhhhhoooohoooo. Its scary out here in the world of rock n'

roll. Ohooohoo. Ahh haa haa haa haah, Ah haa haa haaah. Ahh

haa haa, hegh achh ach.

Scared ya, didn't I? Ha ha'