Lyrics:

[typical library sounds, squeekin chairs/doors]

[talking quietly]
M1: ms. murphy is such a pain, man.
M2: we just had a test a week ago. now we gotta take another one tommorrow. this sucks!
M1: and it counts for 80 percent of our grade.
M2: well we better study our butts off.
M1: well we came to the right place, the ever so quiet library.
M2: ok, enough talking, let's study!
M1: all right.
[turning pages]

[heavy steps]
M2: uh oh
M1: oh no! fatty mcgee is coming. we'll never get any studying done with him in the library.
[heavy steps continue]
M2: oh god, he's taking the stairs! that means he's going to be way out of breath!

[fatty whining, try to catch breath]
M1: oh no, he's going to sit with us.
Fatty: [annoying whining voice] hey fellas, studying for the big test?
M1: uh, yes fatty, we were.
Fatty: [still trying to catch breath] great! I'll join ya.
[fatty pulls out chair and falls into it, still whining horribly]
M2: hey fatty, why don't you go to the bathroom 'till you catch your breath?
Fatty: no, no, I'm catching it!
[fatty continuing to whine and snort]
M1: ok, ok fatty, but try to keep the wheezing level down, we're trying to concentrate.
Fatty: [continuing to wheeze and whine louder] sure, no problem.
M1: oh man.
Fatty: [still snorting and whining loudly] this test counts for eighty percent of our grade, you know.
[whining continues even louder]
M1: yes fatty, we know, we just said that.
[wheezing continues a little softer]
M2: fatty! please keep it down!

[fatty makes snoring/whining sounds]

M2: is he sleeping!?
M1: no, it's his deviated sceptum. seriously fatty, keep the breathing down. [snoring stops, more weird noise starts]
M2: ahh geez fatty, what's wrong with you!?
Fatty: [pausing, snorting] I'm trying.
[whining continues]
M1: fatty, you know what's going to happen! stop breathing so heavy! please we gotta study!
[whining gets higher and higher until it's continuous]
M2: oh no, that one's going to do it!

[fire alarm sounding, fire trucks honking their horns, sirens reeling]
M2: fatty, the fire department thinks the fire alarm went off again!
Fatty: [continuing his loud annoying whine] I'm sorry!
Fireman ray: fire! man the building!
M1: sorry fireman ray, it's not the fire alarm.
Fireman ray: fatty mcgee, is that you again!?
Fatty: [stillin whining annoyingly] yes. [snort] sorry. [snort]
Fireman ray: didn't we tell you not to take the stairs anymore!?
Fatty: [whiney voice] but I like the stairs!
Fireman ray: [annoyed] why!?
Fatty: [still whining horribly] they're fun!
Fireman ray: oh fatty mcgee, you're the fattest!
[everyone laughing at stupid joke]
[raspberry]