Lyrics:

Gary (Jason Segel)
I reflect on my reflection
And I ask myself the question
What's the right direction to go?
I don't know

Am I a man or am I Muppet?
Muppet Gary
(Am I a Muppet?)
Gary
If I'm a Muppet, then I'm a very manly Muppet
Muppet Gary
(Very manly Muppet)
Gary
Am I a Muppet...
Muppet Gary
(...Muppet)
Gary
Or am I a man?
Muppet Gary
(Am I a man?)
Gary
If I'm a man, that makes me a Muppet of a man
Muppet Gary
(A Muppet of a man)

Walter
I look into these eyes
And I don't recognize
The one I see inside
It's time for me to decide

Am I a man or am I Muppet?
Human Walter (Jim Parsons)
(Am I a Muppet?)
Walter
If I'm a Muppet, well I'm a very manly Muppet
Human Walter
(Very manly Muppet)
Walter
Am I a Muppet...
Human Walter
(Muppet)
Walter
Or am I a man?
Human Walter
(Am I a man?)
Walter
If I'm a man, that makes me a Muppet of a man
Human Walter
(A Muppet of a man)

Gary and Walter
Here I go again
I'm always running out of time
I think I made up my mind
Now I understand who I am

Gary
I'm a man!

Walter
I'm a Muppet!

Gary
I'm a Muppet of a man!

Walter
I'm a very manly Muppet!

Gary
I'm a Muppety man!

Gary and Walter
That's what I am