Lyrics:

Woke up early on Saturday
My tie was still on and my hat was
Resting on the bed post
Sunglasses lost in the sheets

But oh, who will I call?
Chevys an ass and Gildas got a cold
I always took the fall
It didnt matter then
Because John would always laugh
But hes not laughing now

Rushed to call my agent on Monday
I need new work to get my head out of this
Its with a young kid named Murray
Its a ghost flick but the hell with it

And oh, who will I call?
Chevys an ass and Gildas got a cold
I always took the fall
It didnt matter then
Because John would always laugh
But hes not laughing now

I knew the guy he used to buy from
I may have even introduced them
He was a skinny guy from Brooklyn
Arms always full of women

So I decided to take my shotgun
And take a long walk to Brooklyn
Id make him put the outfit on
And strap him into the chair

Then I stuffed everything in his mouth
Everything he was holding
I left him there to shout
I had an audition

And we have to move on
Without our brother John
And everybodys got to sing new songs

So Elwood, its time
To move on

And oh, who will I call?
Chevys an ass and Gildas got a cold
I always took the fall
It didnt matter then
Because John would always laugh
But man, it matters now
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