Lyrics:

A celery
You need a
A celery
If you want to fit in

A celery
It gets you through to half time
A celery

Why don't you, erm, smash the system from within
(A celery)

Get yourself a promotion
And then take your children to the zoo for the weekend
(A celery)
With the extra cash you've got there

I got some cash
(A celery)
Oooh, I had a job once, it was awful

A celery

Bloodsuckers!
New carpets

A celery

For money in emergencies, bus fares
(A celery)

Kids and stuff