Lyrics:

Okay, good day, this is our Christmas part of the album
And you can play this at your Christmas parties, uh
Or to yourself on Christmas Eve, if there's nothing else to do

Good day, eh?
In case you thought, like, I wasn't on this part!

Oh, I guarantee ya, you'd be on
Okay, so, good day, this is the Christmas part
And we're gonna tell you what to get, uh, your true love for Christmas

Look out the window!

Where?! What are you doing?

Snow, hosehead

Wha? Oh, it's the Great White North, and it's snowing,
Cause it's Christmas time
Hey, hoser!

What?

Here's a quiz Quiz for Doug

Okay, I have my thinking toque on

Yeah, right
What are the twelve days of Christmas?
'Cause, figure it out, right Christmas is when?

Uh, the 25th

Right, and what's the 24th, Christmas Eve, right?
So, that's two and then, what's after that?

Um uh, Wrestling Day

No get out

Boxing Day, yeah, yeah

That's three
Then what's after that? Nothing

New Year's

Four And what's

New Year's Eve

Five Where do you get twelve?

Uh there's two Saturdays and Sundays in there, that's four
That's nine and three other days, which I believe are the mystery days

Okay now
This is our Christmas song
In case you don't know what to get somebody for Christmas

There's lots of ideas in here, so, listen, and don't get stuck

Okay

By the way, that's me on the organ

Aw, Jeez

You start

Okay
On the first day of Christmas
My true love gave to me, a beer

On the second day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Two turtlenecks and a beer (okay)
On the third day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer (okay)

There should be more there, right?

Where? Go

Fourth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer

In a tree, see you need more
Fifth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Five golden touques!
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer, what was it? In a tree!

Okay, on the sixth go
Of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Six packs of two-four
Five golden touques!
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer in a tree!

Okay, kay

On the seventh day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Seven packs of smokes
(Nice gift) oh, six packs of two-four!
Five golden touques!
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer in a tree!

Right, I keep forgetting
Phew! This should just be the two days of Christmas
It's too hard for us!

Um
Go, hoser
Oh

Eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Eight comic books
Seven packs of smokes, six packs of two-four
Five golden touques!
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer on my tree

Yeah That beer's empty okay day uh twelve!
Uh, twelve
Good day, and welcome to day twelve

Five golden touques!
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer, in a tree

Beauty, eh?

Where'd you learn to do that?

Uh, albums

Boy so, like, that's our song, merry Christmas

Merry Christmas!

And good day!

Good day, everybody
Happy New Year, too
Okay, you know what you left out?

What?

Donuts
I told you to get me donuts!
Either on the ninth day or the tenth day
Or the eleventh day, I wanted donuts!

Okay, the song's over

But I want

Merry Christmas, everybody!

Or on the twelfth day, you coulda got me a dozen donuts

So, go out to the stores, and get some presents

You coulda gone down to, like, the good donut shop
Where if you buy a dozen, you get another one free
And then thirteen for the thirteen days of Christmas

Well, next Christmas, I'll get me a chainsaw

Take off!

Boy, that song was a beauty It moved me

Yeah, I think it ranks up there with Stairway to Heaven

What?