Lyrics:

The narrator of the song is a rent-a-cop, or, an occasionally-armed security guard for hire that’s not a part of the regular police force.
They can often be found in malls or shopping centers.I'm trolling food court for girls
Yeah, it's the best job in the world
They know they're safe with me
They love my little mustache
They love a man in uniform
Ooh
With my sunglasses they can't
See what I'm really looking at
And as they're walking by
I whisper through my doughnut
Hey baby, baby light that ass on fire
Yeah
How long must this day go on?
I got to stand here two more hours till I
Punch the clock
All alone in this great big mall
Ooh
No kid, they don't give me a gun
I don't get paid enough to run
So you can call me what you want
I'll be hanging at the check out
Checking out your girlfriend
Figure out how she's going to fit all of that
Butt into that underwear - yeah
Yeah

Hey girl if you can't recall
Where you parked your daddy's car
Then I could help you out
All alone in this great big mall
Oh
How long must this day go on?
I got to stand here two more hours
Till it's Miller Time
All alone in this great big mall
Whoa
I'm trolling food court for girls
I whisper through my doughnut
I whisper through my doughnut
I whisper through my doughnut
Hey baby baby, hey baby baby baby
Light that
Light that ass on fire
Alright, that's good