Lyrics:

These are the tales the freaky tales
These are the tales that I tell so well
You dont like my dirty raps? You can go to hell
Cause $hort Dawg is on the mic spittin Cocktales

[Verse 1]
H-E-A-D
All you washed-up hoes trying to throw that P
You're just a big freak, you better not complain
When you hear these cocktales and you hear your name
If you a fake bitch, ain't no thing
I'll pick up the phone and call Janine

If I call Marie, I know for a fact
I'm getting sucked in my drop-top Cadillac
I met this freak named Naomi
Straight dick-sucker, worked me and my homies
She had a girlfriend, her name was Vickie
I pulled her to the side and let her suck my dick

She was fine as fuck, but can't fuck with Tina
Tina, Tina, the sperm cleana'
I took her to my house and I told her 'strip'
Baby got freaky - started doing the splits
I said, 'Bee-yotch! Do what you want
Cause this true-blue mack won't even front'
I fucked her with my finger, she tried to cum
Pussy so tight it wouldn't give me none
I'm Too Short, baby, couldn't be no punk
I'm trying to get freaky cause I love the funk
My dick is big and her nigga had a little one
I didn't fuck her freaky ass but it was still fun

I know you stop and wonder just what it is
It's the California lifestyle that I live
See I'm from the Crew, Dangerous, Bitch
I get on the mic and spit that freaky shit
I know this girl named Annette
Get her all alone and she'll suck your dick
Hella freaky, won't say no for shit
You and her all alone, nigga, that's your bitch

I know another freak her name's Joanne
I always get the pussy cause I know I can
Finest bitch around, ain't got no man
Every time she cross my mind I go fuck her again
She's like another bitch named Christina
Bitch so dumb, I named her 'misdemeanor'
Cause it had to be a crime to be that dumb
I took her to my house and she let me cum in her mouth
You know I did all that shit
She got my number, if she beep me, I'm gonna call that bitch
And go dig in them guts like a gardener
If she starts screaming I'm gonna fuck the bitch harder

[Hook]
Cause these are the tales, the freaky tales
These are the tales I tell so well
You don't like my dirty rap you can go to hell
Cause Short Dogg's on the mic telling cocktales

[Verse 2]
I meet the groupies, hookers like Kathy
Fucking MC's cause she's so nasty
See her backstage trying to throw that ass
She just like the freaks and she had to pass me that pussy
You can't stop the bitch
Let her roll on my vogues then I drop the bitch
My name is Short, my game is long
I freak these hoes and sing these songs
I know a bitch named Stephanie
Do anything she can to have sex with me
She really don't bring out the best in me
But I love her fine ass laying next to me

She's like another freak named Nicole
So damn sprung on my diamonds and gold
I took her to my house, she gave me the panties
I fucked her so good she told her friend named Angie
Angie called me up about 2 weeks later
Talking some shit about 'do me, player'
So I did her just like Tamara
Taking naked pictures with my Polaroid camera
Next they told a bitch named Raquel
Got my skin all under her fingernails
She was digging in my back while I grind the shit
That was way back, now I can't find the bitch
But if I do, I'll probably do the same again
Break the bitch for everything, cause I came to pimp
I'm Too Short, baby, I don't stop macking
I grab the microphone and I don't stop rapping
You can bet your life as I spit these raps
I'll be fucking em up like that, bitch!

I know a bitch, her name was Sherry
I had to cut her loose cause she wanted to get married
Pussy so good and I do mean very
Sometimes it's shaved and sometimes it's hairy
I'm Short Dogg, ain't nothing nice
You ever make me mad and I'll fuck your wife
Have fun with your bitch and have her sprung on my dick
I guess I'll pull it out and just cum on your bitch

Like my other little tramp named Erica
Anywhere I want to fuck, that's where I fuck
Cause she's the freakiest bitch in America
And every time I get the pussy, I just tear it up

Cause these are the tales, the freaky tales
These are the tales that I tell so well
You dont like my dirty raps you can go to hell
Cause Short Dog is on mic spittin Cocktales
Be-yotch! And it dont stop to the beat