Lyrics:

Feeling kind of bony On the telephoney Talking to Marconi Eating Rice-a-Roni Nominated for a Tony For acting like a phoney Watching Twilight Zoney On my forty-two inch Sony This is just a long song It ain't no poem Leave the lights on till your baby gets home It's like sitting in the kitchen When the music's really bitchin' Your nose it starts to itchin' As you count your old age pension Did I forget to mention The ride that I was hitchin' To the Aluminum Convention I had such good intention Keep your cotton pickin' fingers off My song poem And leave the lights on till your baby gets home Leave the lights on till your baby gets home Leave the lights on till your baby gets home Don't forget your toothbrush Your hairbrush and your comb Leave the lights on till your baby gets home Got a big ol' dog A chrome crowbar I keep that mother humper in the back seat of my car Me and Billy Shakespeare Stepped out to get a root beer We sat together so near People thought we were queer Punctuated by the big scare We joined the Air Force right there To defend our country first class Who couldn't give a rat's ass Don't you tell me that the White House is my home Leave the lights on till your baby gets home Leave the lights on till your baby gets home Leave the lights on till your baby gets home Don't forget your toothbrush Your hairbrush and your comb Leave the lights on till your baby gets home Got a big ol' dog A big iron bar I keep that mother humper in the back seat of my car It's like kissing Greta Garbo with a mouth full of marbles Like trying to cash