Lyrics:

Oh Lighten Up, Where's Your Sense Of Humor
they're Just Tiny Little Rumors
that I Started 'cause I'm Lookin' Out For You
oh Settle Down, I'm Just A Little Jealous
and I'm Sure Those Other Fellas
never Once Believed The Lies I Told Were True

like The Time I Told That Cowboy
that You Used To Be A Man
and The Doctor You Were Datin'
that You Hide Your Wedding Band
even If I Am Responsible For Scaring Them Away
you Really Ought To Thank Me
i Was Doin' You A Favor
'cause It Never Woulda Worked Out Anyway

oh Can't You See, The Reason That I'm Doin'
all The Crazy Things I'm Doin'
is Because I Really Care About You Girl
and I'll Admit I Go A Little Farther
than I Know I Probably Oughta
but It's All Because I Need You In My World

like The Time I Told That Lawyer
that You Spent A Year In Jail
and The Salesman You Were Seein'
you Hang Out In Cheap Motels
even If I Am Responsible For Scaring Them Away
you Really Ought To Thank Me
i Was Doin' You A Favor
'cause It Never Woulda Worked Out Anyway

i Can't Stand The Thought Of You
with Anybody Else
i Know I've Gone Overboard
but I Can't Help Myself

like The Time I Told That Dentist
you Had Seven Little Kids
and You Doubled As A Dancer At The Strip Club On The Ridge
even If I Am Responsible For Scaring Them Away
you Really Ought To Thank Me
i Was Doin' You A Favor
'cause It Never Woulda Worked Out Anyway

it's All Because I Love You And
i Can't Stop Thinking Of You
and It Never Woulda Worked Out Anyway