Lyrics:

([Act One)
Move...
Move in closer...
Move in closer to the...
Move in closer to the middle of the frame

(Act Two)
It was a morning just like any other morning
In the Sinai desert, 1200 B. C
It glistened, it glowed, it rose from the gold of the children of Israel
...And most of the adults
The cash cow!

The golden cash cow had a body like the great cows of ancient Egypt
And a face like the face of Robert Tilton
...Without the horns
And through the centuries is has roamed the earth
Like a ravenous bovine
Seeking whom it may lick
Cash cow!
Cash cow!

From the valley of the shadow of the outlet mall
To customized petwear boutique
From the trailer of the fry chef
To the palace of the sheik
The cash cow lurks
The cash cow lurks
The cash cow lurks
HA HA HA HA...

Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-ooooooo

Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo

I was in love and I needed the money
And then I needed more money
I was filthy rich and all I wanted was love
...And a little more money

Woe to you, proud mortal
Secure in your modest digs
You think you're immune?
You, who couldn't finger said cow in a police line-up with the three little pigs!
Cash cow!
Master of disguises!

Who's gonna change shape at will?
Who's the eye on the pyramid on the back of the dollar bill?
Who loves power lunchin' from Spago to Sizzler?

Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-ooooooo

Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo

Who loves you, baby?
Who'll give you good credit?
Who says you'll regret it?
Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo

Cash cow comin' to get ya
Why?
Cuz you think this is stupid, don't you?
The cash cow will not be mocked!
The cash cow's planning a coup!
The cash cow chews cud bigger than you!

Woe, woe, woe to you
Who blow off this warning
Perhaps you've already been licked
I, too, was hypnotized
By those big cow eyes
The last time I uttered those three little words
"I deserve better!"

(Act Three - instrumental)