Lyrics:

I read about a man who'd been
Around the world and back again
Built a spaceship in his backyard
And went to Mars one afternoon
When he got home late that night
He said the people, they were kind
Bought him drinks and entertained him
And that's where he'd been all this time

But do they play the bagpipes on Mars?
Do they have a shrine to Elvis?
Easy payments on their cars?
And what do they know about us?
Do they fly in flying saucers?
Do they have to take the bus?

Well, I got pretty curious and I built a spacecraft of my own
Blew a gasket and lost my oil a half a million miles from home
Fortunately, a family of Martians came a-drivin' by
Picked me up, their daughter liked me
Now we're married and the kids look fine

But do they play the bagpipes on Mars?
Do they have a shrine to Elvis?
Easy payments on their cars?
And what do they know about you and me?
Do they recycle plastic and steal cable TV?


Now, I got pretty homesick, so I started up a little band
We got famous, three gold records
Bought the Partridge family's van
Got bombed out on Uranus
Rave reviews on Venus
Things got hot on Mercury
That's where I burned my piano

And now they're playing bagpipes on Mars
They've got a drive-thru shrine to Elvis, photo radar on their cars
They've learned everything from you and me
They're hanging out at singles bars and watching MTV
Yes, they are