Lyrics:

I wanna be a field day for the Sundays, so they can fuck up my life
Embarrass my wife, and leave a bad taste
Striped toothpaste can't remove on Monday morning
I wanna be a target for the dailies, so they can show
Pictures of me, with a nude on page three
So lacking in taste
Touched up near the waist, looking as limp as Monday morning
Touched up near the waist, looking as limp as Monday morning