Lyrics:

Who maddest one on the M1
Who hasn't stopped sucking his thumb
Who very straight and never grins
Who cares what car he's driving in

He is because he saw it on a commercial break
And if he doesn't get what he wants
Then he get a headache
'Cos he needs it
Wants it
Almost
Loves it
He's here on his own
On globe alone
Here on his own

Who joined health club to glisten
Into hi-fi precision
Who mobile phone gives him the bone
Who very keen on Sharon Stone

And then he says...

Who eats at the new brasserie
Who only ever gets merry
Who wouldn't be seen at bedtime
Without putting Calvin Kleins on