Lyrics:

The Shepherd raises up his staff
And hurls it at the crowd
To the sound of a maniacal calliope

And Leo the Lion reclines on the throne
He had built by the boys in the band
And the crown upon his head reads 'By the Queen's decree'

Do we all agree
Luck knows no justice at all

Everyone's a self made man
There before the thing began
Making such a circus of the best laid plans

Everyone's responsible, empty words and purses full
Making such a circus of the best laid plans

The best laid plans
The best laid plans
Hey, the best laid plans

The clowns arrive in a pirate ship
And pose before the crowd
Hilarious remarks and inactivity

They throw the dog faced boy a bone
Command him to play dead
For the Hollywood and Hollywood infirmary
For the standard fee (repeat after me)
Luck knows no justice at all

Everyone was paid their fee
I made you and you made me
And we made such a circus of the best laid plans

Everyone's responsible, empty words and purses full
Making such a circus --
The circus of the best laid plans

You can tell a big man by the company he fleeces
Step right on up here son see how your wealth increases
Get your cross of iron, get your thirty silver pieces

Hey! Best laid plans
Best laid... best laid plans

Here's Dr. Dogma's smug prescriptions
Placebo cures of all descriptions
Shucking and jiving for the circus of the best laid plans

I wish I might, I wish I may
You've ruined my August and it's only May
I'm off to join the circus, Dad
Of the best laid plans

Everyone's a self-made man
And there before the thing began
Making such a circus of the best laid plans

Everyone's responsible
Empty words and purses full
Making such a circus
Of the best laid, the best laid plans

Everyone was paid their fee
I made you, and you made me
(Best laid plans)
Best laid -- hey!

Everyone can fill their nose
Everyone can strike their pose
Welcome to the circus
The circus of the best laid plans -- hey hey!

Everyone's a self-made man
There before the thing began
No, no, no
The circus of the best laid plans

Everyone's responsible
Empty words and purses full.......