Lyrics:

I Bet You're Wondering How I Knew
that Prince Charles And Lady Di Were Through.
was Waiting In Line At The Grocery Store.
took A Peek At The Dirt About Demi Moore.
and It Took Me By Surprise I Must Say
when I Found Out The Pope Was Gay.

i Read It In The Tabloids.
elvis Presley's Doing Just Fine.
they Put It In The Tabloids.
got A Look At Fergi's Boobs, My My.
honey, Honey, Yeah.

you Know Jfk Didn't Really Die.
they Got A Picture And He Looks All Right.
and Ross Perot's Hanging Out With Et.
this Woman Had A Kid At A Hundred And Three.

and You Could Have Seen It All For Yourself
'cause It's Right There Upon The Shelf.
oh, I Read It In The Tabloids.
you Know Madonna Used To Be A Boy.
i Saw It In The Tabloids
right Next To A Cure For Hemorrhoids.
honey, Honey, Yeah