Lyrics:

Standing on a golf course, dressed in PVC
I chanced upon a golf girl selling cups of tea
She asked me did I want one, asked me with a grin
For thruppence you can buy one full right to the brim
So, of course I had to have one, in fact I ordered three
So I could watch the golf girl, could see she fancied me
And later on the golf course after drinking tea
It started raining golf balls, she protected me

Her name was Pat, and we sat
Under a tree, she kissed me
And we go for walks in fine weather
All together on the golf course, we talk in morse


Standing on a golf course, dressed in PVC
I chanced upon a golf girl selling cups of tea
She asked me did I want one, asked me with a grin
For thruppence you can buy one full right to the brim
So of course I had to have one, in fact I ordered three
So I could watch the golf girl, could see she fancied me
And later on the golf course after drinking tea
It started raining golf balls, she protected me

Her name was Pat, and we sat
Under a tree, she kissed me, me