Lyrics:

Veren zol fun dir a blintse
How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
And all the goyim say I'm pretty fly for a rabbi
Meccha leccha hi, meccha hiney hiney ho

Our temple's had a fair share of rabbis in the past
But most of 'em were nudniks, and none of them would last
But our new guy's real kosher, I think he'll do the trick
I tell ya, he's to die for! He really knows his shtick!

So how's by you?
Have you seen this Jew?
Reads the Torah
Does his own accounting, too!
Working like a dog at the synagogue
He's there all day, he's there all day
Just say 'Vey iz mir!' and he'll kick into gear
He'll bring you lots of cheer
And maybe bagels with some schmear
So grab your yarmulke
And hey, hey! Do that Hebrew thing!

How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
And all the goyim say I'm pretty fly for a rabbi
He shops at discount stores, not just any will suffice
He has to find a bargain, ’cause he won't pay retail price
He never acts meshugga and he's hardly a schlemiel
But if you wanna haggle, oy, he'll make you such a deal!

People used to scoff, now they say 'Mazel tov!'
He's such a macher ’cause he works his tuchis off
Yeah, he keeps his cool
And teaches shul
What's not to like? What's not to like?
On high holy days, you know he prays and prays
And he never eats pastrami on white bread with mayonnaise
Put on your yarmulke
And hey, hey! Do that Hebrew thing!

When he's doing a Bar Mitzvah, now that you shouldn't miss
He'll always shlep on down for a wedding or a briss
They say he's got a lot of chutzpah, he's really quite hip
The parents pay the moyl and he gets to keep the tip!

How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
How ya doin', Bernie? (Oy vey! Oy vey!)
Meccha leccha hi, meccha meccha cholly ho

He's doing well! I gotta kvell!
The yentas love him, even shiksas think he's swell
Shows up at his home and says, 'Shalom!'
And 'Have some cake! You want some cake?'
Yeah, he calls the shots
We really love him lots!
Oy gevalt, I'm so verklempt that I could plotz
So grab your yarmulke
The one you got for Hanukkah
Let's put on our yarmulkes
And hey, hey! Do that Hebrew thing!