Lyrics:

I'm tired of buying Penthouse and Oui and Hustler
It's Friday night I'm all alone still a bachelor
She said she'd call me when she'd finished work
Haven't heard a word all day
I may not be Warren Beatty or Mohammed Ali
(Attractive female wanted)
I ain't asking a great deal, just a female to move in with me
(Attractive female wanted)
I'll share all my records, toothbrush and car
And color TV, honestly
A single girl for my single bed is my remedy
(Attractive female wanted)

She doesn't have to be a movie star
Cover of a magazine
She can work in a garage all day
In the evening some canteen

I'm tired of blind dates making silly mistakes
It's embarrassing
(Attractive female wanted)
I've had no complaints
But obviously you've guessed
No compliments
(Attractive female wanted)

Won't someone please answer my prayers
Before I'm old and grey
(Attractive female wanted)
I've been lonely too long
All of my family think I'm gay

She doesn't have to be a movie star
Cover of magazine
She can work in a garage all day
In the evening some canteen

Attractive female wanted
Active female wanted
I may get drunk stink like a skunk
But she'll look after me
(Attractive female wanted)
Put me to bed ease my aching head
And made fuss of me
You know what I gonna do
Think I'll write a letter
To Mr. Hugh Heffner confidentially
Dear Sir
A single girl for my single bed is my remedy