Lyrics:

Holland is ruled by midgets The Pope owns CBS The subway cars have been equipped with bars And they're cloning Rudolph Hess Samantha Fox has gone frigid The President's painted green Jesus Christ has been frozen in ice But he still makes the scene Everybody wants to know what gives But I know where the Tarantula lives Jim Bakker got eaten by wombats The Fever's spread to town Ol' Doris Day has been taken away Has anybody seen my downs? Popeye got killed in combat Donny and Marie went punk B.F. Skinner has eaten my dinner There's a body in that trunk Everybody wants to know what gives But I know where the Tarantula lives Uncle Bob caught fire The protesters are on strike Mr. Green Jeans is acting obscene 'Cause his Jello has been spiked Honesty is a liar The truth is in the sink Auntie Bess says