Lyrics:

The gospel according to Tony Day (x3)
If I find a girl he'll take her away
Rotten Tony

The gospel according to Brendan O'Lear (x3)
If I buy him a scotch he'll buy me a beer
Tight fist, friends

The gospel according to Pat Hewitt (x3)
If it's written on a sweater then I'd better not do it
Gotta gotta, your mind, blow it, blow it

The gospel according to Marianne Brent (x3)
She'll be mine if I pay the rent
Good old Marianne, who needs friends, oh

Waste of flippin' time, take a look at my life and you'll see
Take a quick, butchers, rotten Harry down the hall
Wouldn't give me tuppence for him