Lyrics:

DRUNK AND CRAZY
Bobby Bare

Hello, everybody. I have come to say
I didn't come to stay. I just come to play.
So lock all the doors and open up the wine.
Tell all the pretty ladies to get in line.

'Cause I'm drunk and crazy...
Drunk and crazy...
Drunk and crazy.
Gonna let the good times roll.

Way across the room I see a fancy fox.
I got the key to open up her lock.
I slide across the floor like a greasy eel.
I say, 'Baby, tell me how do you feel?'

She says, 'Drunk and crazy...
Drunk and crazy...
Drunk and crazy.
Gonna let the good times roll.'

I was just about to put the cake in the oven.
Look over my shoulder... there's her big ol' husband.
He was turnin' blue. He was seein' red.
He knocked me down, slapped me 'round
And stomped on my head.

'Cause he was drunk and crazy...
Drunk and crazy...
Drunk and crazy.
Gonna let the good times roll.

They got me to the hospital in the nick of time.
I had a fractured skull and a busted spine.
When in come the doctor... he could hardly stand.
He had a bottle in his pocket and a scalpel in his hand.
And he was drunk and crazy, no no doctor...

Drunk and crazy...
Drunk and crazy.
Gonna let the good times roll.