Lyrics:

How to stay paralyzed by fear of abandonment

How to defer to men in solvable predicaments

How to control someone to be a carbon copy of you

How to have that not work and have them run away from you

How to keep people at arms length and never get to close

How to mistrust the ones you supposedly love the most

How to pretend you’re fine and don’t need help from anyone

How to feel worthless unless you’re helping



I’ll teach you all this in 8 easy steps

In the course of a lifetime you’ll never forget

I’ll show you how to in 8 easy steps

I’ll show you how leadership looks when taught by the best



How to hate women when you’re supposed to be a feminist

How to play all highest when you’re really a hypocrite

How to hate God when you’re a prayer and a spiritualist

How to sabotage your fantasies



Chorus



I’ve been doing research for years

I’ve been practicing my ass off

I’ve been waiting my whole life for this moment, I swear to you

Culminating just to be this well versed leader before you



Chorus



How to lie to yourself and thereby to everyone else

How to keep smiling when you’re thinking of killing yourself

How to normalaholic (?) to avoid going within

How to stay stuck in your life blaming them



Chorus 2x