Lyrics:

Ooh that crazy Barbara boy is she a pest
At schools she leans all over me and copies from my test
She's got the desk behind me and pokes me with her toes
And every time I turn around she wrinkles up her nose
Yesterday practically in front of the whole class she blurted out
Hello Moo-Moo, hello Moo-Moo
Why does she have to go and call me Moo-Moo for?
Just because she heard my mother call me it?
My name is Maurice!
Ooh that crazy Barbara always asking where I've been
I wish that she'd butt out for once instead of butting in
I went swimming up the creek and I had nothing on
And when I looked back on the shore all my clothes were gone
At first I thought it was the fellas, and then I recognized her voice and she was up in a tree and she was yelling
Stuck in the water! Stuck in the water!
Hmm, she thinks she's as good as a boy
And she couldn't even climb all the way to the top!
She'd like to be on my team but she can't play at all
'Cause if I ever threw her one she'd never see the ball
And what if Alan Schmouder likes the way she looks
I'd like to see him catch me carrying her books
I wish I didn't have to be her husband in a play
'Cause when I have to kiss her all the guys will say
Moo-Moo loves Barbara! Moo-Moo loves Barbara!
Ooh that crazy Barbara, I hate that crazy Barbara
And I'll never marry her someday