Lyrics:

Hello Muddah
Hello Father
Here I am at Camp Granada
Camp is very entertaining
And they say we'll have some fun if it stops raining
I went hiking with Joe Spivy
He developed poison ivy
You'll remember Leonard Skinner
He got ptomaine position last night after dinner
All the counselors hate the waiters
And the lake has alligators
And the head coach wants no sissies
So he reads to us from something called 'Ulysses'
Now I don't want this should scare ya
But my bunkmate has malaria
You remember Jeffrey Hardy
They're about to organize a searching party
Take me home
Oh Muddah Faddah
Take me home
I hate Granada
Don't leave me
Out in the forest where
I might get eaten by a bear
Take me home
I promise I will not make noise
Or mess the house with other boys
Oh please don't make me stay
I've been here one whole day

Dearest Faddah
Darling Muddah
How's my precious little bruddah?
Let me come home if you miss me
I would even let aunt Bertha hug and kiss me
Wait a minute
It's stopped hailing
Guys are swimming
Guys are sailing
Playing baseball
Gee that's better
Muddah Faddah kindly disregard this letter