Lyrics:

The US, the US
Thinks their army is the best
But our troops can stand for hours
With their arms up and no rest

France's tanks are the first
To go only in reverse
And our rifles, you can't top 'em
They won't go off when we drop 'em

We'll just sit on the bench
After all, folks, we're the French
When the fighting starts we look for an egress
And when this war is through
We will still spit on you
What a mess, we detest the US

Here in France there's no chance
We will ever change our stance
When I heard a war had started
I put on my plastic pants

A purple heart I once earned
When my armpits got sunburned
And to see a Frenchman cower
Just attack him with a shower

Silly French are not dumb
We're like Springsteen, "Born to Run"
We would sacrifice our king if this were chess
If this were World War III
We'd run like week-old brie
Can't care less, but we stress
Jerry Lewis is the best
We digress, we detest the US

Vive le France!