Lyrics:

Today I saw her brother
Who said she's with another
They've gone away together
You'd better speak to Heather
And so I spoke to Heather
At first about the weather
And then about her sister
And how I really missed her
Maybe she could tell her
I've still got her umbrella
She prized it rather highly
It saved her once in Filey
It came on all torrential
And therefore it's essential
You tell me where she's living
So it to her I'm giving

Broadstairs
She's in Broadstairs
She's in Broadstairs
B for Broadstairs

Apparently she's seeing
A bloke who used to be in
A scenic regulator [???]
From nearer the [???] equator
I couldn't bear to listen
Or stand to see them kissing
Unable to forgive her
I jumped into the river
I'm on another planet
She's on the Isle of Thanet
I wake up on a trolley
And realise the folly
I tell them I can manage
There isn't any damage
And as I'm being led out
I get my A-to-Z out

Broadstairs
She's in Broadstairs
She's in Broadstairs
B for Broadstairs

She's in Broadstairs
B for Broadstairs
She's in Broadstairs
B for Broadstairs