Lyrics:

I poured a dram and I closed my eyes
I’m in a room with the whisky men
All those cool and colourful guys
From nowadays to way back when
Five hundred years of the Whisky Men
Heroes and characters one and all
From monacled Johnny and Charlie Maclean
To Friar John Cor and his twenty-five bolls

All the Whisky Men
I’m in their company
All the Whisky Men
Having a dram with me
Tommy Dewar’s burning my ears
With all the tales of his latest trip
Old Glenlivet just appeared
Packing two pistols on his hip
Long John’s longer than little John Black
But he’s not blacker than old Long John
Jim McEwan never holds back
His wonderful stories rolling on and on

All the Whisky Men
I’m in their company
All the Whisky Men
Having a dram with me

Bernasconi has the biggest whisky bar
Two and a half thousand to be precise
Gunter Sommer has the smallest by far
No wine no vodka no beer no ice
Richard Paterson in a very nice tie
Is throwing stuff around like he tends to do
Angels are teaching Michael Jackson to fly
He’s a Yorkshire Lithuanian atheist Jew

All the Whisky Men
I’m in their company
All the Whisky Men
Having a dram with me

Jim Murray’s preaching from his bible again
And Restless Peter can’t keep still
All the Grants are down from the Glen
Pip Hills is grilling Dr Bill
I see two guys who are having a row
Aeneas Coffey and Robert Stein
It’s time to open some whisky now
Pour them a dram and they’ll get along fine

All the Whisky Men
I’m in their company
All the Whisky Men
Having a dram with me

Suddenly my dream goes Pop!
All the whisky men disappear
I didn’t want this dream to stop
I’m softly sobbing in my beer
A door flies open with a sudden noise
Shrieks of laughter and bows and frills
Now I don’t miss those whisky boys
I’m surrounded by the whisky girls

All the whisky girls
I’m in their company
All the whisky girls
Having a dram with me

All the whisky girls
I’m in their company
All the whisky girls
Laughing and teasing me