Lyrics:

This is a song about vegetables, they keep ya regular
They're real good for ya

Call any vegetable (call any vegetable)
Call it by name (call any vegetable)
Call one today (call any vegetable)
When you get off the train (call any vegetable)

Call any vegetable and the chances are good
Aw, the vegetable will respond to you

Some people don't go for prunes, I don't know
I've always found that if they-

Call any vegetable (call any vegetable)
Pick up your phone (call any vegetable)
Think of a vegetable (call any vegetable)
Lonely at home (call any vegetable)

Call any vegetable and the chances are good
That a vegetable will respond to you
Rutabaga, rutabaga
Rutabaga, rutabaga
Rutabay-y-y-y...

A prune isn't really a vegetable
Cabbage is a vegetable

No one will know if you don't want to let them know
No one will know 'less it's you that might tell them so
Call and they'll come to you, covered with dew
Vegetables dream of responding to you
Standing there shiny and proud by your side
Holding your hand while the neighbors decide
Why is a vegetable something to hide?