Lyrics:

The coffee at the hospital
Was a low-down nasty sludge
I got 19 compound fractures and
I'm talking to the judge
And if that judge don't bust you,
I'll take you to the one that will

'Cause I would not be in traction if I did not fall in love

Call me a dumbbell, call me a spoiled slug,
I tumbled down your staircase,
And I'm taking you to court.
If that court don't bust you, mama,
I'll take you to the one that will

'Cause I would not be in traction if I did not fall in love

(Oh no!)

I would not be on my feet,
I swear by god above.
My arm and first 3 fingers
Are in a plaster glove

I would not be in traction if I did not fall in love

If that cop don't bust you baby,
I'll take you to the one that will.

'Cause I would not be in traction if I did not fall in love

The coffee at the hospital
Was a low-down nasty sludge
I got 19 compound fractures, baby
Talkin' to the judge
If that judge don't bust you, mama
I'll take you to the one that will

But I would not be in traction if I did not fall in love